No Retreat, No Surrender

The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won! The Heat won!

And what a glorious face-stuffing it was. Damn, I love it when my home team wins on the other guy's turf. Like when the Marlins thrashed the Yankees in the high cathedral of baseball.

Can I get a witness?

I've been working on a joke all week, the punchline of which was going to be "It wasn't the Heat, it was the Humidity." I never quite got the set up to my satisfaction, but as things stand (The Heat won!) I don't need to, do I?

And then there's this joke that I can't remember (do we sense a trend creeping in) the punchline of which is "Trick question, Lemmy IS God." But I think that today, that would have to be Dwyane Wade is God.

What a game! What a bunch of clutch players! What a game! What a hot time in Miami!

And for the record, sports announcer guys? The fact that Heat players can't hit from the free-throw line is sort of a team hallmark, OK? It started 18 years ago with the guy who was supposed to be the franchise then, one Rony Seikaly, who was the most-fouled player in the NBA because it was universally known that the guy couldn't sink a free-throw if his life (and/or career) depended on it. How bad was he? He was sooo bad, that even Heat fans yelled "AIR BALL" every time he stepped to the line.

Or at least one of us did. But then, I also had this theory: Rony Seikaly and Vinnie Testaverde are the same person. You never see them in the same place at the same time, and they both needed the Heimlich manuever every time they played in the clutch.

Oh, and Pat Riley? Total. Hottie.