Tagged by a Meme, Dammit

Oh, you all know that sometimes, just sometimes, I'm a sucker for a meme. When it has to do with art or books or music, I'm only too happy to play along. So. From Miss Bliss to me and then to five of you:

1. One book that changed your life: Walter Pater's Conclusion to the Renaissance

2. One book that you’ve read more than once: The Bushwhacked Piano

3.One book you’d want on a desert island: The Baroque Cycle

4. One book that made you laugh: The Joyous Season

5. One book that made you cry: The Once & Future King

6. One book that you wish had been written: Oh No, Ho; You Are NOT Doing That In Public

7. One book that you wish had never been written: The Celestine Prophecy (Truly, Deeply, Awful)

8. One book you’re currently reading: Hacking Moveable Type (pathetic, isn't it?)

9. One book you’ve been meaning to read: The Complete Diaries of Samuel Pepys

10. Now tag five people: RJ, Mild Child, Jade, Marceeah, Larry
Boy-HOW-dee, was last night the best Project Runway, EVER, or WHAT?

They really, really had me going with Laura's reference to the Olsen twins, and the clip of Heidi saying there'd be two special guests. The fan blogs/forums had been rife with speculation about why the "special benefits to winning a challenge" line was dubbed in and what those special benefits could possibly be. Last night we found out, with a vengence.

The show opened with the three boys left standing (Kayne, Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo, and Michael) all congratulating themselves and each other about still being there. Kayne and JTPS are just ripping on Vincent being gone, and laughing and laughing and laughing about him going home. Maybe that was gloating, gloating, gloating. Whichever. And Jeffrey being Jeffrey, he has to bring up how happy he still is over the fact that Angela is gone and he won two challenges, but mostly, Angela is gone.

Over in their room, the girls are much better behaved, and Laura is just beaten down by pregnancy, the criticism of the other designers, pregnancy, stress and her last week's review on the runway. Noooooo. We love you, Laura (especially with your hair loose). Just put on a little lipstick and get back in the game.

At the studio, or Parsons, or the runway, or where ever the hell Heidi gives them their next challenges, the designers are told HA HA, no challenge for YOU today, you guys are going to a party tonight and we will have not one, but two special guests and that's when you'll get your challenge. Then Heidi, wearing a very large pink and paisley scarf as a very short dress, gives them a nasty smile and a buh-bye and they are left to ponder the implications amongst themselves. Or maybe have a day off to sleep. That's what I'd do, anyway.

Exterior, night

We are outside of a bar. Inside, there is lots and lots and lots of champagne and the remaining five designers. Doesn't look like much of a par-tay to me, but that's what champagne is for, n'est pas? Of course they pop the corks, and, in what is only his second slip of the entire show, Michael literally pops the cork, and the wine spews everywhere. Dawg, that may be the way they open champers in the hood, but the correct way is to hold the cork and turn the bottle until the cork eases out and there is a slight pop, but the bubbles and the wine stay in the bottle where they are supposed to be. Note: both Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo-and-recovering-alcoholic and Preggers Laura are tossing it back tonight.

In comes Heidi, and intros the first of their two special guests, and it's ----- VINCENT!!!!

Well, children, you have never seen pouting and stink eye and displays of blatant unhappiness and sulking and what not like we see next, since the last time someone ate the red crayon in a pre-school coloring hour. And that's just Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo. He did show enough self control to not actually throw himself on the floor and pound his heels and fists and cry. But just barely. Instead, he settled for sulking on the settee like any old spoiled teenager. And when the second special guest proves to be Angela, well, sweetiedarlings, Kayne just gets on the settee with him and the two can barely be civil to each other, much less the rest of the gang.

The special benefit of winning a challenge (and Keith Malvoy being sent home for cheating, thus leaving the producers one designer short for elimination), it turns out, is a second chance. They each won a challenge, and so they get to come back for one last ride. The only caveat is that the only way they get to continue is to win the challenge. Otherwise? Back on the bus to East Jesus.

The party ends right there and then, with the two losers coming back into the mix. Some of the designers are more gracious about it than others. Imagine that.

Back at the Atlas, Laura explains to Angela how she, Angela, is only there because she rode to victory on the backs of Michael and Laura. Angela, true to form, disagrees and totally doesn't get that she would have lost had not the tasteful twosome grabbed those nasty little Signature Angela Fleurchons out of her mitts and limited her to a couple of them as buttons. Really? she asks. You think? Laura arches her perfect eyebrows, rolls her baby blues and says, DUH. Out here in television land, another million or so folks do the same and add, Oh, HELL to the yes, Angela.

Oh, yeah. the challenge. I almost forgot about it, what with all the drama and shit. A cocktail ensemble. In black and white. Only. And PS? The designers have to use every scrap of fabric they buy. If it's as large or larger than a postcard, they need to use it, somehow.

Angela asks Tim, before they go to Mood, if they can choose one or the other... he says, uh, no. Both. Black and white. Together. Remember this.

The Night of the Living Fleurchons

There is so much going on in this episode, that we don't even get to watch the designers shop. We go from sketching and kvetching to sewing. Laura is having a breakdown. She's lost her mojo. She's lost her ego. She's lost at sea and can't tell anymore what's good and what's bad. Speaking of which...

Vincent is sure he will win with a white top that looks like the Guggenheim Museum (better than it sounds) and a black eyelet slim skirt. He's bought way too much fabric and chooses to make a really awful, vee-shaped drape, uh, shawl to go with the dress. Vincent is hamstrung, too, by the fact that his model has been in a bicycle wreck on her way to the show, and he is given a new (also previously auf'ed) model as a replacement. She is nowhere near the same size as Jia, and splits every seam on his dress and he has to sew her in as she's getting hair and make up.

Uli is working with (don't be shocked!) black and white patterned flowy silks. Guess what? It's the same fucking dress, only short, and with sleeves that look like they aren't really sleeves, but opera-length gloves with no hands, only fluttery hand openings. Yeah. I didn't get it, either. It's Uli goes to Ren Fest, and it isn't particularly pretty. She makes an ugly necklace out of her extra fabric by stuffing a tube of one fabric with wads of other fabric and bunching it up at intervals to look like ginormous bead things. Woof.

Michael makes an asymetrical white dress with a huge black cumberbund with floral cut outs and add-ons and it is, as always with our man Michael, utter perfection on Nazri. Nazri must be hot stuff, because I actually know his model's name and the rest of them are just...the models. Michael lines a purse, or stuffs a purse, I couldn't really tell, with his extra fabric.

Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo makes something that is atrocious, even by his low standards. It's black faux-pleather footless thigh-highs and a micro miniskirted bo-ho blouse. It's mostly white with black patterning.

Laura invokes the name and spirit of Josephine Baker (HEY! That's my dog's name/namesake, and now I love Laura even more than ever) and makes a white sorta mini-baby doll dress with black lace overlay, black lace trim on the square neckline and long, sleek, daggery feathers and beading along the hemline. It is, as always, impeccably tailored. Sigh. She makes a purse with her scraps.

Kayne uses black and black only to make a bat-winged, boat necked dress with no back. It's held on or held together by a white shoelace going through giant tabs all around the cut-out back. It's worse than it sounds. Tim almost bitch-slaps Kayne when he discovers that the only white material Kayne has is "trims" and the way Tim says the word "trim" makes it sound very, very dirty indeed. He makes a purse with his left-over trims.

Angela has made... a mess. She's made a micro-shrug out of black vinyl (?), and a sloppy, backless, shapeless, sleeveless hot mess of what is supposed to be a dress to go under it. The collar of the micro-shrug looks like Dracula's cape got mugged by white fleurchons on the way to the runway, and they are breeding all over it. It's eating her model's face, in fact, and it is just worse than anything else out there, except maybe Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo's pleatherette thigh-highs. She's stuffed all her extra fabric into a crocodile mini-hatbox purse. The purse is from the Macy's accessory wall. Why she didn't make one of her stupid Signature Angela Fluerchon Covered sacks, instead? It's Angela, so who knows.

Don't Cry Out Loud

On the runway, the emergency back up judge tonight is Zac Posen, wearing a silver ascot. Oh, come on. Nina points out to Angela that one doesn't need to stuff material in a stiff, box-like purse to shape it, and that as far as she's concerned, Angela bent the rules so far that they snapped.

Michael Kors, in what is perhaps his first fashion faux-pas of the season, says that everything Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo has done till now just looks like Gwen Stefani, to which I call bullshit. Gwen may make some questionable fashion choices (a bustle on a mini-skirt?) but she would never, ever, ever be caught dead in those broke-ass pleatherette thigh-highs.

Michael also does a dead-on impersonation of Uli and her mantra, "I'm from Miami, I design for hot veather." I'm laughing so hard, that I almost spilled my cosmopolitan.

Zac Posen shows some spot-on analysis of what he's seeing out there on the runway, despite the fact that he dressed himself in a silver ascot.

Everyone hates the proportions on Vincent's homage to the Guggenheim, and when he uses the awful shawl thing to add length to his skirt it looks much, much, much better. I thought about it for a while, and I think he should have done a full, gored skirt with the extra material, and I think the contrast between a very structured white top and the black eyelet and black sateen fullness could have been a winner for him. Oh, well. I'm not one of the voices in his head.

The winner? Miss Laura, but it could just as easily have gone to Michael. Once more, the judges gushed over how this guy is a fashion natural, a genius; how his presentation is always flawless, from hair and make up to accessories. I think they just didn't want him to win three.

Since you had to win to stay, Angela and Vincent go bye-bye once more. Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo and Kayne are the bottom two. Kayne is (finally) given the boot for having, in White Trash vernacular, all of his taste in his mouth. In his final interview, Kayne lets us all know that he really isn't a bitch, he just played one on tee-vee. Yeah. Nice try, Nancy. Ain't none of us believin' that shit.

The only thing that could have made this episode any better would have been to see Jeffrey-the-pinheaded-Shmoo get tossed out on his shaved eyebrow. And one other thing. Dude. The fly-eye sunglasses with the rhinestones? Did Kayne give you those, because a) they are SO not rock and roll, and b) they are SO gay.

Whew. That was exhausting. PS... the closet was finished just in time for Project Runway, and I got to sleep in my real bed last night. Like I said at the beginning of this entry, was last night great, or what.
The closet rehab is a real-life example of Murphy's Law in action. It started out so easily, and quickly descended into a domino fall of small annoyances, work stoppages and but firsts.

The demolition went smoothly, with lots and lots of bang hammering and prybar work. FUN! But the DYIers who owned this house before always did things the easy way, so when I pulled the shelves out, great gobs of concrete wall came out too. They used nails into concrete rather than drilling and using concrete mollys.

So. Off to Home Depot for spackle, and new paint (gotta paint over the big gaps where previously there hung wooden shelves and shelf supports) (also: the big patches of spackle), and a concrete drill bit, and a level, and what girl doesn't want a plumb line? and then there in the back of the tool corral was a 100-piece accessory kit for my Dremel, and maybe a little light for the closet? Yes. That was the HD run.

Did you know that at Home Depot, in the paint section, there are usually cans of rejected colors or extra cans of stuff that people brought back and it's all marked at $5 a gallon? I've bought Ralph Lauren there, in the exact color I would have had mixed, had it not been sitting in the reject pile for cheap. This weekend, I found what looked like an exact match for the shallow-end-of-the-swimming-pool aqua that is my bedroom. Once it dried, however, it's more of a robin's egg blue. A little more grayish/blueish/lavenderish color. Who cares, it's in the closet. And feel free to make your own jokes about that.

Back home, where I spackle and sand, rinse and repeat, wait for the spackle to dry and then paint the closet. It is now 10:30 at night and the end of day 2 of the closet project.

On Monday, the RLA hunts and gathers dinner for us, and after we eat, the RLA puts on the safety glasses and filter mask and has at the rear wall with the concrete drill. It is slow and painful, only partly because he is attempting to drill into 53-year old concrete, and he finally sucks it up and uses the old, 1950's drill with a cord, as opposed to the sleek, battery-powered model he loves. Whaddaya know? The old drill with a cord has way more torque and the rest of the job goes smoothly. On to the side wall, where we discover that: at the height we need to drill, it is NOT concrete, but drywall. The only thing we can figure is that the walls are concrete up to the level of the eaves, and the sloping part of the wall, where it goes to the roof peak, is drywall. Why? Ask the guy who built this dump house in 1954.

It's now 10:30 on Monday night, and we are done in. Back to the trundle bed in the living room, which is getting more comfortable every night.

On Tuesday, after his morning class, the RLA heads off to the Home Depot/Container Store for the correct anchors for drywall and the correct drill bit for same. No extra Dremel toys, boohoo. Once I get home from work, the next phase of the operation begins. We measure, level and drill. It's going well, too well. Sure enough, we hit another snag: there is a block of Dade County Pine behind the wall on the RLA's side of the closet. NOTHING drills through Dade County Pine. NOTHING. Nada. Zip. Forget it, it's only one screw, and it's not on the end of the rail. I manage to break not one, but two lamps in the closet during this portion of the evening.

Finally, I break out the wet vac and a mop, and I clean, clean, and re-clean all the plaster dust and random dog fur and regular dust from all surfaces in the closet. We wait for it to dry. We go back in. We begin to hang the vertical supports, and. There is a 4x4 cross beam that extends from side wall to side wall. We don't know why. We think it may be a weight-bearing structure, sort of like a flying buttress, but we're not sure, and we sure as hell are not going to take it down. It's in the middle of the closet, depth-wise. It, of course, interferes with installing the vertical supports.

Out comes the Dremel (I LOVE that tool) and the RLA carves out another set of notches. We hang the vertical supports. All that's left is to hang the actual shelves and clothes rods, and build and install the drawers. But, you know what? It's now 10:30pm and the RLA and I don't even have enough energy left to argue about whether or not we should continue. I'm asleep on the trundle, dog at my side (or head. or feet.) by the time he finishes brushing his teeth.

Tonight is the final push, and if my clothes aren't hung up in the closet by the time Project Runway starts, I'm just going to give up, call the trundle my bedroom and accept the fact that when I say closet, what I really mean is the pile of clothes on what used to be my bed.
The boss forwarded this to me, from New York City, where he is attending a conference. It is an essay, or a transcript (I'm not sure which) from Keith Olbermann, former sportscaster and only journalist in America today with the cojones to point at The Shrub and say "The emporer is buck nekkid."
"Sept. 11, 2006 | 8:32 p.m. ET

This hole in the ground

Half a lifetime ago, I worked in this now-empty space. And for 40 days after the attacks, I worked here again, trying to make sense of what happened, and was yet to happen, as a reporter.

All the time, I knew that the very air I breathed contained the remains of thousands of people, including four of my friends, two in the planes and -- as I discovered from those "missing posters" seared still into my soul -- two more in the Towers.

And I knew too, that this was the pyre for hundreds of New York policemen and firemen, of whom my family can claim half a dozen or more, as our ancestors.

I belabor this to emphasize that, for me this was, and is, and always shall be, personal.

And anyone who claims that I and others like me are "soft,"or have "forgotten" the lessons of what happened here is at best a grasping, opportunistic, dilettante and at worst, an idiot whether he is a commentator, or a Vice President, or a President.

However, of all the things those of us who were here five years ago could have forecast -- of all the nightmares that unfolded before our eyes, and the others that unfolded only in our minds -- none of us could have predicted this.

Five years later this space is still empty.

Five years later there is no memorial to the dead.

Five years later there is no building rising to show with proud defiance that we would not have our America wrung from us, by cowards and criminals.

Five years later this country's wound is still open.

Five years later this country's mass grave is still unmarked.

Five years later this is still just a background for a photo-op.

It is beyond shameful.

At the dedication of the Gettysburg Memorial -- barely four months after the last soldier staggered from another Pennsylvania field -- Mr. Lincoln said, "we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract."

Lincoln used those words to immortalize their sacrifice.

Today our leaders could use those same words to rationalize their reprehensible inaction. "We cannot dedicate, we can not consecrate, we can not hallow this ground." So we won't.

Instead they bicker and buck pass. They thwart private efforts, and jostle to claim credit for initiatives that go nowhere. They spend the money on irrelevant wars, and elaborate self-congratulations, and buying off columnists to write how good a job they're doing instead of doing any job at all.

Five years later, Mr. Bush, we are still fighting the terrorists on these streets. And look carefully, sir, on these 16 empty acres. The terrorists are clearly, still winning.

And, in a crime against every victim here and every patriotic sentiment you mouthed but did not enact, you have done nothing about it.

And there is something worse still than this vast gaping hole in this city, and in the fabric of our nation. There is its symbolism of the promise unfulfilled, the urgent oath, reduced to lazy execution.

The only positive on 9/11 and the days and weeks that so slowly and painfully followed it was the unanimous humanity, here, and throughout the country. The government, the President in particular, was given every possible measure of support.

Those who did not belong to his party -- tabled that.

Those who doubted the mechanics of his election -- ignored that.

Those who wondered of his qualifications -- forgot that.

History teaches us that nearly unanimous support of a government cannot be taken away from that government by its critics. It can only be squandered by those who use it not to heal a nation's wounds, but to take political advantage.

Terrorists did not come and steal our newly-regained sense of being American first, and political, fiftieth. Nor did the Democrats. Nor did the media. Nor did the people.

The President -- and those around him -- did that.

They promised bi-partisanship, and then showed that to them, "bi-partisanship" meant that their party would rule and the rest would have to follow, or be branded, with ever-escalating hysteria, as morally or intellectually confused, as appeasers, as those who, in the Vice President's words yesterday, "validate the strategy of the terrorists."

They promised protection, and then showed that to them "protection" meant going to war against a despot whose hand they had once shaken, a despot who we now learn from our own Senate Intelligence Committee, hated al-Qaida as much as we did.

The polite phrase for how so many of us were duped into supporting a war, on the false premise that it had 'something to do' with 9/11 is "lying by implication."

The impolite phrase is "impeachable offense."

Not once in now five years has this President ever offered to assume responsibility for the failures that led to this empty space, and to this, the current, curdled, version of our beloved country.

Still, there is a last snapping flame from a final candle of respect and fairness: even his most virulent critics have never suggested he alone bears the full brunt of the blame for 9/11.

Half the time, in fact, this President has been so gently treated, that he has seemed not even to be the man most responsible for anything in his own administration.

Yet what is happening this very night?

A mini-series, created, influenced -- possibly financed by -- the most radical and cold of domestic political Machiavellis, continues to be televised into our homes.

The documented truths of the last fifteen years are replaced by bald-faced lies; the talking points of the current regime parroted; the whole sorry story blurred, by spin, to make the party out of office seem vacillating and impotent, and the party in office, seem like the only option.

How dare you, Mr. President, after taking cynical advantage of the unanimity and love, and transmuting it into fraudulent war and needless death, after monstrously transforming it into fear and suspicion and turning that fear into the campaign slogan of three elections? How dare you -- or those around you -- ever "spin" 9/11?

Just as the terrorists have succeeded -- are still succeeding -- as long as there is no memorial and no construction here at Ground Zero.

So, too, have they succeeded, and are still succeeding as long as this government uses 9/11 as a wedge to pit Americans against Americans.

This is an odd point to cite a television program, especially one from March of 1960. But as Disney's continuing sell-out of the truth (and this country) suggests, even television programs can be powerful things.

And long ago, a series called "The Twilight Zone" broadcast a riveting episode entitled "The Monsters Are Due On Maple Street."

In brief: a meteor sparks rumors of an invasion by extra-terrestrials disguised as humans. The electricity goes out. A neighbor pleads for calm. Suddenly his car -- and only his car -- starts. Someone suggests he must be the alien. Then another man's lights go on. As charges and suspicion and panic overtake the street, guns are inevitably produced. An "alien" is shot -- but he turns out to be just another neighbor, returning from going for help. The camera pulls back to a near-by
hill, where two extra-terrestrials are seen manipulating a small device that can jam electricity. The veteran tells his novice that there's no need to actually attack, that you just turn off a few of the human machines and then, "they pick the most dangerous enemy they can find, and it's themselves."

And then, in perhaps his finest piece of writing, Rod Serling sums it up with words of remarkable prescience, given where we find ourselves tonight: "The tools of conquest do not necessarily come with bombs and explosions and fallout. There are weapons that are simply thoughts, attitudes, prejudices, to be found only in the minds of men.

"For the record, prejudices can kill and suspicion can destroy, and a thoughtless, frightened search for a scapegoat has a fallout all its own -- for the children, and the children yet unborn."

When those who dissent are told time and time again -- as we will be, if not tonight by the President, then tomorrow by his portable public chorus -- that he is preserving our freedom, but that if we use any of it, we are somehow un-American...When we are scolded, that if we merely question, we have "forgotten the lessons of 9/11"... look into this empty space behind me and the bi-partisanship upon which this administration also did not build, and tell me:

Who has left this hole in the ground?

We have not forgotten, Mr. President.

You have.

May this country forgive you."


And then there is this, from The Rude Pundit, who also went to Ground Zero to see the elephant President.

9/11/2006

Reporting From Ground Zero on the Fifth Anniversary of the Last Good Day:

Yesterday, on September 10, when he read that George W. Bush was going to lay a wreath down in the middle of the hole in the ground that was the World Trade Center twin towers, the Rude Pundit decided to head on down to Ground Zero to see his President in person. He expected massive crowds and a crazed media circus, because this was, after all, the President returning to the site of his iconic image, of the moment that cemented the nation on its present disastrous course. He had never seen Bush in the flesh and wanted to look on his actual physical form, get a measure of the man so many of us have spent so much time despising.

When he emerged from the subway through the WTC Path Station, the Rude Pundit was greeted by protesters, also expected. He saw drumming Buddhist monks and their monk-y wannabes drumming along flanked by large black balloons, behind a flag-draped coffin and signs demanding that the soldiers be brought home. Stopping a couple of young women in tight black shirts that read, in Arabic and English, "We will not be silent," the Rude Pundit asked, "Did you wear those intentionally? Because of the guy who couldn't get onto the plane?" They said they were aware of the incident, but, no, they wore the shirts because, indeed, they would not be silent.

The most protesters were from different groups calling for the "truth" about 9/11 to be revealed, the ones who, to varying degrees, believe the events of the day were supported and/or engineered by the U.S. government, the Israeli government, or some combination of them. Someone associated with the conspiracy-theorizing viral video sensation Loose Change gave the Rude Pundit a DVD of the film, which he will watch, as he told the guy, "skeptically." One 9/11 truth seeker was in a screaming fight with what can best be described as one of the "Crazed Old Coots For America," the various old guys decked out in American flag clothes and pro-Bush regalia spoiling for a fight. At least they didn't try to go toe to toe with the Grandmas For Peace, also there, also holding signs. One of the Grandmas said, "I just can't stand what Bush has done to us all, so I came down here to let him know."

Others there wanted freedom for Taiwan or pronounced the end of the world is nigh so it was time to get right with Jesus. One guy walked through the crowd screaming that homosexual soldiers rape Iraqi babies. It was hard to tell what side he was on.

Moving away from the station, looking for a place to watch the President do his wreath-laying solemnity, the Rude Pundit walked along the perimeter fence, looking around at all the security, the Secret Service with their tell-tale earpieces, the snipers on balconies and rooftops. Along the fence, people stared at mounted pictures of the day five years and a little over 12 hours ago. Every so often, there would be someone crying behind sunglasses or looking as if they had just finished or held back tears. Some wore pictures of loved ones on chains or shirts; some carried flyers that were reminiscent of the missing posters from back then. This time the flyers told short stories about the life of the dead person. One group wore name tags that said, "Surviving Family Member." It looked like two familes, one white, one Hispanic. They were being guided by an Asian woman who pointed out where each tower had stood. One of the Hispanic men posted a flyer over a "Post No Bills" sign. It was about his sister.

Walking past the lists of names that wrongly label everyone who died one of the "Heroes of 9/11" (sorry, but you don't get to be a hero just because you died at a certain place at a certain time unless you actually did something heroic), past Fire Station 10 and the soon-to-be open 9/11 Visitor's Center, the Rude Pundit was struck by how, compared to what he expected, very few people were actually there. Certainly not more than a couple of thousand. The President of the United States, the leader of the free world, the man who stood on the ruins and made such poignant promises to us, was going to be back at the ruins and, in as much as such numbers have meaning, on the eve of the fifth anniversary of the attacks. Shouldn't it have been packed? Shouldn't we have all stood shoulder to shoulder to watch? As pornographically as Bush exploits the event and makes Americans into victims, shouldn't more people have wanted to mourn with him? The Rude Pundit's seen more people out here on ordinary summer days.

He looked through the barrier fence down into the footprints of the towers. The long ramp that leads to the center of the pit had been theatrically lined with the flags of, one presumes, all the states and nations that lost people in the attacks. He heard bagpipes and saw honor guard, police and fire officials, and others down there. He thought about how small George Bush was going to seem from this vantage point, as close as one could get to the event without actually being inside. He was just going to be a teeny-tiny man in a great big hole, laying a wreath for America in a temporary reflecting pool.

Then NYPD officers, politely, to be sure, told all of us who stood there wanting to watch our President, some of whom wanted to mourn with him at least distantly, that we had to move out. The area was going to be secured. In fact, most of the perimeter would be secured and no one would be allowed close enough to the fence to see the President. No, the only way to truly see him would be to watch him on television. Where he wouldn't seem so teeny-tiny, so reduced in scale to the epic destruction that surrounded him. And, indeed, when you watch video of the event, with the Bushes, Mike Bloomberg, George Pataki, and Rudy Giuliani lined up and walking down the ramp, they forcibly look out of scale to the vast construction site around them. However, from anyone who could see from above, see the actual context of the event, they were very, very small.

The Rude Pundit walked out of the secure area as they put up barricades. Now, with the fence itself off limits, the crowds thinned out even further. Maybe this was the intention, for George Bush to have a private moment of mourning, except, of course, for all the TV cameras there. After thinking about heading to an Irish pub off Fulton Street where he often hopelessly flirts with the raven-haired Jersey girl behind the bar who can yank a tap like nobody's business, he decided to head home. The train station was closed because the President was going to be near it. So the Rude Pundit walked uptown a bit, past the protesters, past the press vans, past the police, and he hailed a cab.

It was only 9/10, after all. And it looked like it might rain.
japsuicide.jpg

She piles all of her clothes on the bed, and jumps off.

That pile is all of the clothing owned by me or the RLA. The random carnage surrounding the pile is everything else that ever lived in our one closet.

I had a shit fit this weekend which nicely coincided with the big Elfa sale at the Container Store, and the results will be posted as soon as tomorrow, if the installation goes as well as I anticipate.

I also got to play with my Dremel this weekend, and I went around the house like a mad woman, cutting the heads off of all the protruding nails in the terrazzo. The former owners of our little Casita des Zapatos put nasty beige carpeting over all of the terrazzo floors. While I was able to rip up the carpets, even before we moved in (first thing I did when I got the keys and the RLA left me alone in the house for a couple of hours), I've never been able to remove the nails without tearing up huge gouts of terrazzo. Since it's hard enough to find someone to polish and seal the stuff, much less someone who can do repairs, I left the nails in (they're only around the edges of the rooms). But yesterday, armed with my Dremel and a stack of extra reinforced cutting disks, I got rid of the nail heads and left smooth little steel dots that are virtually invisible.

I am woman, armed with power tools. Rahr.
The current Rolling Stone cover story is Bob Dylan. The number one Billboard Album is (for the first time in his career) Bob Dylan's newest, Modern Times. There's a new i-pod commercial featuring The Bob. The New York Times' article. The general concensus seems to be that Bob Is Hot.
RS_TheBob.jpg

I feel cheated and dirty. I've loved this man for most of my life and been ridiculed for my obsession, and now he's hot? I mean, I've always been way ahead of the trend, the curve, the whatever, but this is just crazy. Now? Now that Bob is 65 and raggedier than ever, NOW he's hot?

How unfair is this? Now that he and I are creaking into geriatricville, shouldn't I finally have the old goat to myself? Shouldn't my imaginary boyfriend and I get peace at this stage in our lives? Shouldn't he finally have enough time to come to my house for dinner?

No. NOW he's hot. GAH. So fucking unfair. And get this quote from Rolling Stone:

When I ask Dylan what [Alicia] Keys did "to get into your pantheon," he only chuckles at my precious question. "I remember seeing her on the Grammys. I think I was on the show with her, I didn't meet her or anything. But I said to myself, 'There's nothing about that girl I don't like.'"

Oh, girlchild. Do you even know? Do you realize? If The Bob ever said that about me, I would voluntarily allow my ticket to be punched, just so I could have that engraved on my tombstone.

(Heaves a huge sigh) Well, the whole freaking interview is wonderful. He talks about everything from the current crummy state of recording technology to baseball. He's a Derek Jeter fan, and except for the fact that Jeter plays for the Yankees, who could argue? The Bob claims to be a Detroit fan, but I remember that he wrote a song about Catfish Hunter, another NY Yankee. I suspect that the Bob may be a closet Yankee fan, and that might just be the only thing he's ever said or done to make me love him a little less... well that and the whole Born-Again Christian phase. But I've always believed that he only did that to lose money during his divorce from Sarah.

And don't get me started on Sarah. I've said before and I'll say again, it wouldn't have mattered to me what the man did, if he'd written Blood on the Tracks for me, to get me back? It would have worked. I'd have taken him back in a New York minute.

Anyway. After all these years, it seems that the rest of the world has "discovered" Bob. Fine. Now go away and leave him to me.

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