Today's entry is from my boss.

"ABC News says that Bob Woodruff’s near-death experience at the hands of the “last-throes” Iraqi insurgency will not deter this vaunted journalism powerhouse from doing its job. While ABC vows to soldier on, while its staff keep Woodruff in their thoughts/prayers, perhaps all concerned should think about this:


If ABC News had done its job and accurately reported in the late ‘90s on George Bush’s serial failures in his business and personal life …

If ABC News had covered George Bush as aggressively in the 2000 general election campaign as it aggressively and mercilessly covered Al Gore …

If ABC News had covered the Florida recount objectively, instead of taking its marching orders from James Baker and Bush’s cousin at FOX News …

If ABC News had accurately portrayed the pre-9/11 months of the Bush Administration as the most incompetent, disastrous first year of a president since at least Warren Harding …

If ABC News had remained a responsible independent news gatherer instead of a flag-lapel-pin wearing cheerleader after 9/11 …

If ABC News had exposed the Rove/Bush slash-and-burn/destroy-your-political-opponents-at-all-costs-with-putrid-lies tactics of the 2002 election that returned a GOP majority to the U.S. Senate …

If ABC News had accurately portrayed George Bush as a malicious divider not uniter for his entire presidency …

If ABC News had put the Senate ruckus over George Bush’s incompetent/racist judicial nominees in the context of the scores upon scores of moderate (minority) Clinton nominees who were derailed by racist GOP senators in the previous decade instead of covering the Bush nominations as some evil Democratic conspiracy of obstruction and petty spite …

If ABC News had covered the run-up to George Bush’s manufactured war by actually examining the false evidence and straw man arguments presented by Mr. High Crimes and Misdemeanors to the American people and Congress …

If ABC News had covered the run up to George Bush’s manufactured war by giving equal time to critics of Mr. High Crimes and Misdemeanors’ war policy (instead of the 90+% air time given to supporters of the rush to war) …

If ABC News had fully and extensively covered the mass of lies, cover-ups, corruption and bad judgment that were the modus operandi of both the war and the “reconstruction” …

IF ABC News had insisted on holding Colin Powell accountable for his lies before the UN instead of giving him a free pass on his campaign of lies and deception …

If ABC News had refused to cover George Bush’s manufactured, phony campaign events in ’04 as real news events …

If ABC News had refused to allow itself to be manipulated by Rove and George Bush’s wealthy Texas fiends by giving any credence at all to the Swift Boat Liars and the campaign of untruths …

If ABC News had refused to be a mouthpiece for the Bush Campaign’s spin of the day every day in ’04 …

… Then, maybe, just maybe, Bob Woodruff never would have been in Iraq this weekend and would not currently be on a plane back to the U.S. with a part of his brain still lying somewhere in Iraq.


ABC News has no one to blame but …"

Yes. I did. When the RLA and I signed our contract with the new storage company, we also entered to win a home theater sound system. Damn. They called me today to tell me to come get it. You all know how many movies I watch at home (all of them). And the RLA is a total, certifiable audiophile, and the son of another. He's got more speakers hooked up to the tv than I can count, no two pairs alike, and one pair was his father's Acoustic Research from the 60s.

This is just too cool.

True.

Because I:

a) bought a sweat suit

b) confronted my brother about his misbehavior and he admitted wrongdoing

c) did not have a martini Saturday or Sunday, although there was one waiting in the freezer

d) all of the above
And the answer is d.

But, just for the record, I bought the sweat suit because both pieces (hoodie and pants) were the same price as just a hoodie or just a pair of gym sweats. It's a lovely shade of teal. I also told the RLA that if I wore both parts at the same time anywhere other than to the gym, he had my full permission to divorce me, and I wouldn't contest it.

I'm wearing the hoodie now. I wore the sweat pants all day yesterday. I did change into my jeans for the grocery store run.

And another thing: the folks at Television Without Pity seem to have felt that my separated at birth: Osama and Santino — was somehow inappropriate and took down my post. This on a subject where not only did someone else say he was SAB from Rasputin, but linked to a photo of Rasputin's, uh... naughty bits in a jar of formaldehyde. And I hope that was a doctored photo. Or it was a horse named Rasputin. Ick.

Hmmph. No. A quick Google, and there it is, along with a story that seems to come from the Russian version of News of the Weird.

Stick a fork in me. I am done.

So, I'm at the gym this morning, worked out with Nic Cage, then climbed on the old Precor and while I was working up a sweat, watching the "news" on Fox, I had a sudden epiphany.


That's where he's hiding! Right under our noses.

But think on this a moment: they exhibit the same sort of megalomaniacal, supremely arrogant behavior; you just know Santino reeks of patchouli and onions, just like Osama. You've never seen them in the same place at the same time...

Coincidence, or something more sinister?

And a special thanks to my most Southern Sistergirl, Miss Pearlie Mae, for this one.

President George W. Bush was scheduled to visit the Methodist Church outside Washington as part of his last campaign. Karl Rove made a visit to the Bishop and said to him, "We've been getting a lot of bad publicity among Methodists because of Bush's position on stem cell research, the War, and such. I'll gladly make a contribution to the church of $100,000 if during your sermon, you'd say the President is a saint."

The Bishop thinks it over for a few moments and says, "The Church is in desperate need of funds. I will do it."

Bush pompously shows up that following Sunday, looking especially smug, sneering for his photo ops, while strutting his way, cowboy-style, into the church.

As the sermon starts, the Bishop begins his homily:

"George Bush is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite as well as a nitwit. He is a liar, a cheat, probably still a drunk, and a low-intelligence sneaky weasel. He has lied about his military record, and then had the gall to put himself in uniform on a military jet, landing on a carrier, and then posing before a banner stating 'Mission Accomplished.' He invaded a country for oil and money, all the while lying to the American people about the war, with nary a care for the thousands of lives it has taken and continues to take. He is the worst example of a Methodist I've ever personally known or known of. But compared to Dick Cheney, George Bush is a saint."

Or, maybe, should I drop a dime on my brother?

I try so hard in this blog not to talk about my real life, my personal life, except in the most broad strokes. I don't use real names, for the most part. I have a personal journal, kept in ink, kept for myself, and I've journaled for more than 30 years.

So this exercise is more for the joy of writing, and of being read, than for soul searching and deep thoughts.

It's just that at this particular time in my life, things are such that I have very little to say to amuse you, my imaginary readers. I am consumed with
a problem involving my brother, Biggus Dickus, his wife, Incontinentia Buttocks, the family estate, and questions of control of money, honesty, theft, and general skullduggery.

These are the BIG questions, are they not? More so, I think, than the other big questions, you know, life, the universe and everything?

I am not the sort of person who goes to court. I do not desire to see my name in the papers. I have no burning lust for fame (well, maybe a little smouldering lust). As jaundiced as I am, as jaded about the human condition, I want to believe that my own brother isn't screwing me over something as meaningless as money. And yet. All signs point to that very thing.

My mother's silver has gone missing from the family home. Biggus Dickus and his wife were very la-di-dah about that. As of course, they would be, since it was left to me. Or will be left, or would have been left, since Mummy isn't exactly dead, yet.

Last week I had to pay a bill that Biggus Dickus was refusing to pay, related to Mummy's care...from the hurricanes of 2004. He refused to pay, he refused to talk to the lawyer representing the agency that was seeking payment, he refused to listen to me when I told him to just pay the damned bill, he refused to listen to logic, or my psychoanalysis of his behavior. (Biggus Dickus may be a therapist, and by his accounts, a good one, but I spent 10 years on the couch and came away a better person and one with an understanding of pyschology.) I paid it out of my own, limited means.

He's never acknowledged that I pulled our family name and reputation out of a fire of his own making. I am dragging my feet about calling him out on this. I do not want/need this kind of drama, but I am being forced down an unpleasant path.

Or I can bend over and take a royal ass reaming by my own brother and pretend that it isn't happening, never happened, couldn't happen between us.

Or.

I can let out my inner bitch, she who is held in such tight control so that I can live among men. I can, I say, let her out, and go to court and have Biggus Dickus removed as my co-trustee for cause, thereby causing an irreparable rift between me and my only brother. As you can see, this is quite a dilemma, since we love each other so much and so well.

And you want to know why I'm not blogging much these days. Mmmph.